A Lesson in Authenticity

I got some feedback recently.

It went (vaguely, not verbatim) like this “Your blog is great, but I wish I saw more of you in it.”

Nerve well and truly struck. Yes, writing a blog about authentic living requires a level of, well… authenticity.

Most of the posts on here have been fairly detached – for some good reasons.

And because being visible is freakin’ scary.

It brings up all the “But what if people don’t like me? And if they don’t, what does that mean about me? What if, deep down, I’m an unlikable person?” thoughts.

In response, the oh-so-rational part of me says “Come on, of course you’re a likeable person. Sure, you have your moments – so does everyone. You’re human.”

But that fear exists.

I think about all my negative experiences with likeability: being bullied, being scorned, being rejected, being told I wasn’t good enough, being humiliated, being punished, being abused.

And I understand where that fear comes from.

I think about all my positive experiences with likeability: being loved, being accepted, being understood, being appreciated, being valued, being honoured, being fine (just as I am).

And I think maybe it’s time.

Being visible is a calculated risk: we yearn to be seen for who we are, to be understood, and to be known. Yet, when we’re visible, when we stop hiding and reveal ourselves, we risk being judged, rejected and shamed for who we are. All unpleasant experiences, and all experiences that can shake us to our core.

But a large part of me wants to take that risk. There will be days when it feels too much, and I’ll retreat behind the detached voice. I think we need to be able to have that retreat available, otherwise visibility risks becoming exposure.

But I hope there will be days when I can show more of myself, connect with you on a deeper level, and share. I’ve made other attempts at that before, but this is the first that is truly conscious.

So… hello, I’m glad to meet you, and I hope we can get to know each other better.

I’d love to hear your thoughts and experiences about visibility. Drop me a line, or leave a comment below.

 

Photo Credit: pareeerica via Compfight cc

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