This article leaves me feeling both inspired and sad.
Inspired because I agree with a lot of the author’s points.
Sad because it highlights a pretty big issue in the personal development world.
The concept of ‘self-improvement’.
I don’t like the phrase ‘self-improvement’. I’ve used it in the past but as I learn more about myself and about human nature, I’ve grown to dislike its implications: that we should better ourselves, that we’re not good enough as we are.
The ‘not good enough’ story, once it’s there, is especially hard to let go of, but needs to be questioned: compared to what? Who defines what ‘good enough’ is?
We do.
Only we can.
We know ourselves better than anyone else, and only we are qualified to decide what is good enough for us, and what isn’t.
And the only way we can make this decision is to develop our own standards of good enough: not compared to other people, not compared to what society thinks should be good enough, but based on our values and on reality.
Personal development is about getting to know ourselves better, learning more about what makes us tick, working out what’s important to us (and what’s not), digging deep and acknowledging the things we’re afraid to acknowledge.
It’s about learning to acknowledge every part of ourselves: the aspects of our personality we like, and those we feel less comfortable with.
It’s not about fixing, it’s about knowing and accepting.
Instead of self-improvement, I prefer the terms ‘self growth’ or ‘self development’. These don’t suggest there’s anything wrong with who we are now, but that we’re going deeper, building on what we have.
How would you describe your process? Leave a comment and let me know.
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Photo by Tim J on Unsplash